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Marial Awendit: Flowers


If You hide other presences,
Show me what I flower.
I have grown certain things I can’t touch,
That from the splash of sunlight leave mystery behind:
Some things that gift swarms of stings.
The leaves of trees are painting their many colors
And people carry home
Harvests of most things I don’t bear.
I was once shown beautiful
Flowers of a poisonous tree
And where under it a rabbit
Died from a bee’s sting.

I can’t wholly understand you &
I can’t wholly understand myself more.
I’m clearly tired of rearing my desires.
One second, they’re in the water cooling off
And shuffling into the deep,
The next, they are scooping
Wildfires with baskets woven of grass.

Sometimes, I forget and drill holes into the ship
That You say will carry me to Miracle Land,
Just to make it lighter.

Sometimes, I’m filling with honey a holed up container.

There could have been You
And your assembly,
& only flowers
& only rains
& only rivers.
Why give misery a chance?
Why do we need suffering?

My own living is so much a miracle,
I sometimes take it for granted.
I think it blasphemous to understand it.


Ode to Cores

I won’t allow
The beautiful cores
Of my inner wounds
To soothe your golden
Because I have grown
Out of them an entire field
Of flowering hope.

I won’t allow you
To pick my specks
And pin them to the sky,
In attempts to brighten yours,
Because they complete
The miracle that I am.

I won’t allow you
To replace the giggle
In my throat,
Because you can’t brew
The exact joy I can make.

I won’t allow you
To feel my pain,
Because your nerves
May not accurately feel mine.

I won’t give you the keys
Into my mind
– I’m afraid you may get lost
Or rear it in menace.


The Creed

++++++√ The stars are not spread out at night as white grains on a black sheet.
++++++√ Each star shines in its locus.
++++++√ The sun can burn anything close, except what burns to exist.
++++++√ The space we shall never reach is the beginning of infinity.

Poems © Marial Awendit
Image by Uwe Driesel from Pixabay

Marial Awendit
Marial Awendit
Marial Awendit a.k.a. James Marial Matueny Majak, is a South Sudanese poet, essayist, and songwriter. He is published in various literary magazines and anthologies. He is the author of the chapbook poetry collection, The Night Does Not Drown Us, published by Babishai-Niwe Poetry Foundation, Keeping the Sun Secret, a poetry collection published by Mwanaka Media and Publishing Pvt Ltd and Whispers over a Brewing Dawn, published by Carnelian Heart Publishing Ltd. The two full length poetry collections are available on Amazon and many bookstores across the globe. Marial won the 2016 South Sudan Youth Talent Award for the category of Best Poet and the 2018 Babishai-Niwe Poetry Award. He is a finalist for 2023 African Writers Awards.

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