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A Peculiar Blanket: By Seotsa “Soh” Manyeli

stars

Image: European Southern Observatory

It is peculiar. It is a string of stars circling themselves in the grey of dawn above me. I am in a blanket that is torn to pieces by experiences that reject an idea of showing their features even when I ask them to. I look at this pretty show that is frantically cool with the breeze of dawn on my face.

It is startling and strangely the value of its phase as advised by the moon with a smile that is relentlessly bright. It is still peculiar and the blanket on my collar seems to agree with me. It is not there to protect from the chill of the night; it is in attendance as a supporter who has decided to stay with me even through frantic motions of hate from the universe. The fight does not desire to quit and at times it becomes more aggressive than other times. The blanket is still there. It is stubborn and the changes that happen in our lives after the fall are disturbing. Still I look at the stars and see them dancing and coiling through the sky like an infant with a first touch of love; any love. They seem to be ecstatic by the audience of show from me and my dear blanket that has stayed with me with antics of thought to the lost causes. It is a yoke that I have to pull up from time to time. But it is with me and I know that I can never trade it for anything under the heavens. The sun is hidden behind the clouds that seem dark at this time but somehow I sense that it wants me to know it is still there, in attendance, in humility, waiting to be of help to me. No matter how long it will hide behind the clouds, I should always know that it is there and will come forth in due time. The blanket narrates that I should always believe in God even when things are hopeless.

In understanding of this episode I see a path that moves from me to them stars. They are dancing still and the pool of music that surrounds them is fanatically blind to other sides of the heavens. I look down at my feet and see that the path to the stars starts at the foot of my legs. Should I take them stairs to the stars? Yes, I want to. But what if I fall? “No one who has ever danced with the stars entertained fear”. The blanket interrupted. They probably were, but they understood that there was something more important than fear ahead, and they chose to know what it was. They wanted a better life. A healthier life in spirit and ingenuity is what they sought. It was important to them. It was life itself. And their hunt of it was of an element that they can never change their mind about anything anywhere. You have come to that state. What will you do? Will you let it pass?

From the words of this blanket housing my body, I realized that I have come to the most important aspect of my life. I am standing next to the realization of time as I have always sought it. But will I take it? Will I seize the moment and be in gratitude with God forever? Will I seize the moment and be in harmony with them stars forever? Everything goes moving, it keeps going round in circles, it keeps becoming and we also do. Let me take one step towards the stars. And I realize that it is a choice to be happy or not. But the blanket is still there; it is torn, it is ragged, it is aged, but it is with me. I may be older and more ragged than it is, but it has decided to be with me nonetheless. It may not be much, but it has protected me through cold winds, dark nights and yes, through the falling rains. It is torn from the fights that it put up for me. It is shattered from the arguments it has spoken on my behalf. This is the last day of my abusing it. It has brought me where I am and more.

If I can take only one step, I will be a better man. Let me then take that one step to the stars. There is fear because I don’t know what to expect. But try as I might to be in trust of the blanket that has brought me where I am on the day. It is bright, it is jolly, it is excited like a child who is coming home. Maybe this blanket is one of the stars. It is perhaps one with them stars that we are going to. It is becoming heavier around my neck; it is also dancing to the tune of the stars. But I cannot hear the melody; only necks and necks of fluids dancing together.

It is peculiar still, but I think I understand. I see where the path is leading me. It is leading me to myself. I have always sought my identity by trying to identify with people whom I admired. I didn’t realize that I was complete as a person. My journey towards my own stars is mine. No one and nobody can steal that and make it his own. The blanket has granted me many things in the form of talents, opportunities and education. It is now that I am in the path to myself that I have to use them. It is a shattered blanket but solid and strong. It is a blanket still that houses my body and carries it everywhere. It is peculiar still. But I thank it even so. No matter how small, aged and evidently jovial, I trusted in it and now I am home. It is still a peculiar flight and yes, dancing with the stars.

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Image: European Southern Observatory

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